Unexplainable peace

Unexplainable peace
n the last two weeks, we have experienced unexplainable peace and sadness simultaneously. Never did I once think we would be here, early September with an empty closet and no baby.

I never though I would say this, but I miss being pregnant so much. I loved it. I loved the big ole belly, I loved my outtie belly button and I loved the empowering feeling of growing a child. The things that choke me up the most are the craziest- the caffeine restrictions, laying on my belly to read Camden a book and the extra pounds I packed on. Every time I pour my second cup of coffee or look at my shrinking tummy, I just want to curl up and cry. My pregnancy was such a good pregnancy, never once did we have an issue, even to the end. All of it was totally taken for granted.

As we go each day, one thing I am realizing is that I took so much for granted. I was living day to day just surviving. We didn’t even realize we were pregnant until I was 10 weeks along. I seriously was going to the doctor because I though I had induced depression or something! Never once did I think I was pregnant! From then on, everything was such a whirlwind. Camden’s pregnancy and this one were so different in that I didn’t take enough time to be grateful for being pregnant. I just didn’t take enough time to enjoy all that God had given me.

It is so amazing to see all that Carter has done though her short time with us. God has already used her to change me and my walk so much. I know for a fact that my dependency on God has never been like this. I am desperate for a relationship with him like never before. I crave Him and his presence each minute. I am learning each day to not take things for granted. I am so grateful for my GOOD God who has not once left me in this valley and who continues to use this to allow us to have conversations with others that we would have never had otherwise.

So many times we get in the groove of our mundane lives. We do what we need to do to survive each day and we go to bed so we can repeat it all the next day. Carter has woken us up from this SAD life and allowed us to experience God like never before. I hope that you too are seeing that you can’t take anything for granted. Nothing is promised, not even tomorrow, so don’t miss a minute to thank Him for all he has given you and together, let’s do better at taking nothing for granted.

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